It’s 2021 and menstruation is still stigmatised. When you go to buy sanitary pads, the chemist will ensure that it is perfectly wrapped in a newspaper or a brown paper bag. Many women ensure they hide their pad so well on their way to the washroom that nobody will ever find out. Many people aren’t comfortable having any conversation about their period because ever since we were young, we were taught to be quiet about it.
When I had my first period, I wasn’t prepared for it. One morning, while I was getting ready for school, I noticed blood and panicked. I thought I had developed a fatal disease or something. My mom asked me to take a leave that day. She got me a sanitary pad and then went on to tell me everything about it. Back then, my mom wasn’t as woke as she is now. So, period was treated like it’s something you can’t be very open about. And then came a plethora of stain incidents until it got better.
How many of us got our first period before we were prepared? How many of us felt fear, embarrassment and confusion? It can be daunting when you’re bleeding and you don’t know why. Here are five women who get raw and real about their first period and the things they wished they knew about it when they were young girls.
Mitali Shah, 25, Writer
I was 13 when I first got my period. And even though we'd had a brief session on menstruation in school just the week before it, I was scared. I didn't have all the information and we all know how school sessions aren’t comprehensive enough when it comes to period or sex education. I vividly remember the day. My mother was at work and my father and I were eating lunch when I felt my first stomach cramp. I told him and he consoled me and ran to the pharmacy to get me a packet of pads. I called my mother in tears and she explained how I was supposed to wear the pad over the phone. The cramps were awful and I spent the day wrapped in my blanket like a sad, wet burrito.
At 13, I wish someone had told me that it's perfectly normal and there’s no reason to be ashamed. I was lucky to be born into an open-minded family, but I remember my grandmother calling to tell me not to enter the kitchen and to wash my hair on the fourth day because that would somehow purify me.
Mansi Shah, 38, Senior Media Professional
My mom was pretty orthodox, so she decided to never have the conversation about periods with me. That means that when the hushed whispers about menstruation started in school, I thought it was a serious illness. I trooped back home and asked my mom what it was and dramatically claimed I would never get periods. But I did. Then my mom taught me how to put a pad on but everything was so hush-hush, I thought it was a bad thing. I’ll never get over how insane and traumatic my first brush with periods was and I wish people were told openly that it’s a biological function and not like something to be discussed in the corner of the house only with women.
Karishma Chiplunkar, 29, Yoga Instructor
I was in the sixth or seventh grade, and I had gone on a trip. So, I got it while there, but I got it for only one day. That scared me even more. I told my mom that I’m bleeding but I had no idea what periods were. I wish I had known. Parents should be more open about it and give information to their kids about it, beforehand. Also, make them learn how to wear a pad.
Shraddha Bachani, 29, Professor
I got my first period when I was in the 9th grade. To my horror, my mom was travelling and I didn’t want to speak to my dad or grandmother about it. I knew the basics (thanks to the seminars at school), but couldn’t wrap my head around it. I panicked and called a friend because I didn’t know how to use a sanitary pad. So, she came and showed me how to use it. The only thing that I wish I knew is how to use a pad. Also, I wish my mom had spoken about it to me.
Kinjal Dave, 29, Marketing Analyst
I was spotting and that scared me to no extent. I thought something wrong happened to me and I called out to my mom in fear. When she found out that it was just my first period, she calmly told me that it is nothing to be scared of. She explained to me that it is a natural phenomenon and that it will happen every month. Honestly, I was majorly disappointed to know Aunt Flo will visit me every month. My mom showed me how to wear a pad and spoke to me about possible stains. I was very uncomfortable for almost 10 months but eventually, things got better for me. I am glad that my mom told me everything about my period and so clearly.
Make your daughter’s first period easier for her
· There is no standard age of starting to menstruate. So teach your daughter about period when she is at least eight.
· Help her understand what sanitary pads are and how to put one on. Prepare a ‘first period’ kit and give it to her so that if she gets it when you are not around, she can still access it.
· Tell her what to do if she gets her first period when she is in school or outside.
· Most importantly, tell her it is nothing to be embarrassed about.
· Teach your son about period too. Boys too should not stigmatise or ridicule menstruation.
· Ask her school about period education, but don’t rely on it.
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