Despite the debate surrounding social media, it’s definitely here to stay. The rise of social media marketing, digital influencers, and consumption of short-form content are all proof that social media is today so deeply ingrained in our ecosystem. Although it is a great way to connect people and businesses, social media can also be the cause of roadblocks in friendships and romantic relationships. Here’s what we need to understand about the increased usage of social media in personal equations, and how it can erode authentic connections between people.
Causing Jealousy And Scrutiny
If two people have forged a bond online, the foundation is clearly based on a digital connection. Here, there is limited trust as you take digital interactions online at face value. An online forum gives you the opportunity to spy on who your partner is friends with and monitor their activities and exchanges. If you’re constantly going to do this, it is sure to negatively impact your relationship in the long run. You might be misinterpreting certain online cues and reading too much into innocent comments. This trend of stalking your partner doesn’t bode well for your relationship. It can cause unnecessary tension between two people and eat into trust. Learn to take your partner at face value, keep communication open-ended, and speak about what makes you uncomfortable about their social media interactions with others. Remember to follow the same guidelines yourself!
Eliminating Face-To-Face Interactions
When you largely meet and interact with people online, an entire layer of communication is removed from your conversations. You cannot identify or comprehend their physical mannerisms or facial cues, and these are things that should be part of a healthy relationship or friendship. Psychologist Dr Manjula MK says, ‘I recently had a woman consulting me who broke up with her boyfriend, and this anecdote is shared with her consent. She met him online, interacting online initially for a few months. She felt he sounded witty, said all the right things, and found common ground with her on a variety of topics. She was delighted and really felt he could be ‘the one’. So she flew to New Delhi to meet him and found that he was nothing like his online persona. They met over 2-3 days during that visit, and it eventually came out that he had been using Chat GPT and other forms of AI to enable his conversations with her. She was quite dejected, but now knows not to take people she meets online at face value.’
Dr Manjula adds, ‘Apps like Tinder and Bumble may give us a variety of choices now, and we’re able to find like-minded people more easily. However, establishing a deeper connect and authentic bond has definitely become more challenging.’
Oversharing Information
A social media influencer recently got engaged and shared the news on her handle with multiple photos, videos, and reels. Yet, there wasn’t a single picture of her fiancé. When asked by her followers why she was hiding him, she responded by saying he was a private person and preferred not to be tagged on a public social media account.
According to human layer security company Tessian, 4 out of every 5 people on social media post personal information on their handles every single week. Says Dr Manjula, ‘Although it can be challenging if you’re the sort who likes to share details, always take your partner’s feelings into account before you click the post button. Remember, there is no need to prove a point to the world or broadcast your personal happiness if it is at the risk of making your significant other unhappy. Be mindful of voicing grievances, and instead sort them out face-to-face with your partner.’
She adds, ‘Similarly if you have certain boundaries and restrictions about pictures that can be shared, be sure to communicate the dos and don’ts with your partner. Social media portrayals that are not genuine or heartfelt can come across as forced, especially if one partner is reluctant. This is true in the case of friendships as well. Always take consent before you put up someone’s photographs or tag them.’
Ignoring The Real World
How often do we come across this scenario? A family is spending time in the living room, and instead of engaging with one another, each of them is scrolling through multiple reels and videos online. More often than we’d like to admit right? One way in which social media can pose a threat to authentic relationships is if you value your time online more than time spent with your partner. If you’re married or living with someone, leave your phones and devices outside the bedroom. Even otherwise, spend gadget-free time if you’re meeting for dinner or taking a vacation together. You don’t have to feel obliged to be ‘on and available’ all the time, at the cost of your relationship.