Setting Couple Goals In Long-Term Relationships

What does social media mean to you? My feed is full of cat videos and the most humorous women on the internet who create content that is thought-provoking, relatable and hilarious, all at the same time. But every once in a while, my content-consumption streak is broken by pictures and videos of couples that are setting goals, in their own way. The content is often cute, but how many of those couple goals are real?

The best way to consume the content on social media is to do so with a pinch of salt. Relationship goals aren’t about wearing complementary outfits. Neither are those about posting long captions for your bae. Set couple goals that are realistic and personal to you, not what the world says comprises a happy relationship.

Why you should set your own relationship goals?

Every couple is different; what works for someone else may not work for you. Setting your own relationship goals helps you stay committed and focused on improving your connection.

In a long-term relationship, monotony can mushroom once the honeymoon phase is over. You’ve explored each other’s interests; the raging love hormones have settled to make way for calmness. Without your eyes on a few goals, it’s easy to get carried away with the mundaneness of your daily life.

In fact, don’t we set goals for our careers? We also have personal goals with regards to fitness, travel, and more. So why not put the same effort into our relationships? Goals are important to sustain the quality of a connection and to ensure that both the parties involved are thriving.

Things to keep in mind before setting couple goals

Setting couple goals may sound simpler than it actually is. Mindfulness is important while you do so. Keep the following things in mind as you set goals for yourselves.

· Set goals that help you improve not just together, but also individually. Like they say, you can’t pour from an empty cup. So your goals should help you thrive, heal and contribute to your relationship in a healthy manner.

· Your couple goals should come from a place of understanding and empathy. It is not a business deal and you must take into account your needs and flaws. Remember, you both are on the same side of the fence.

· Set a structure that helps both of you feel safe enough to be vulnerable. This also means your relationship should feel like a safe space to express opinions and feedbacks.

· Ensure your goals are achievable and measurable. Celebrate each milestone with a simple reward system.

Important relationship goals for happy couples

Here are a few goals that can help enhance your connection as a couple.

Be motivated to fulfil each other’s needs: Often, what we do is to care for our own needs and neglect our partner’s. But that’s not the way a healthy relationship works. If you care for your partner’s needs and they care for yours, then both your needs are being met and none of you is being selfish. Works, doesn’t it?

Prioritise ‘me time’ as much as ‘us time’: Couples love spending as much time as they can together. Often, we end up losing our individuality or compromise on the things we want to do because our partners aren’t up for them. However, you need ‘me time’ to recharge, to reflect, introspect and just use it as an opportunity to miss each other. Also, do things you want to do, solo or with friends and family, even if your partner isn’t interested in them.

Leave vengeance out of the door: Vengeance can do more damage than good. When we are angry, we may feel tempted to get back at them with what seems like a dose of their own medicine. But is that the kind of relationship you want? Talk it out if something bothers you instead of seeking revenge.

Understand each other’s love language: You may not have the same love language. Maybe one person likes to be physically affectionate and the other shows love through doing things that help you. Your relationship goal should be to not only understand each other’s love language but also be kind enough to express love in the other person’s language.

Never bad-mouth each other in front of others: You will have conflicts, and misunderstandings as every couple does. But communicate with each other about things that bother you. Refrain from going around bad-mouthing your partner. It’s not very healthy and opens up your relationship to third-party interference.

Keep the intimacy alive: Over a period of time, many couples end up losing their spark. However, you must ensure that you keep your intimacy alive. Schedule nights of intimacy, plan date nights and have cute rituals such as not saying bye without a hug and a kiss.

Be a ‘fix it’ couple: Many people hate change or having to go out of their comfort zone. You may feel tempted to say things like, ‘this is how I am, deal with it’ but things don’t work out that way. No matter what happens, ensure you both are up for fixing things and not brushing them under the carpet.

Fun couple goals ideas that can spice things up

Here are fun ideas that can help you keep the spark alive in your long-term relationship.

· Plan a fixed number of date nights every month. Pick each other’s outfits to make things more fun.

· Take at least one long and two short holidays every year.

· Learn something new together. For instance, sign up for a dance class or a language course.

· Explore each other’s interests. You both get a wild card which enables you to plan a day for both of you.

· At the end of the day, tell each other about your day.

· Cuddle and kiss, every single day.

Celebs who have been setting cute couple goals

1) Katrina Kaif and Vicky Kaushal

All eyes had been on the recently married couple as paparazzi followed their lives, meticulously. They kept their relationship low-key, even though they were often spotted together. As they tied the knot, both Kaif and Kaushal shared their wedding pictures, with the same caption, being beautifully in sync.

2) Anushka Sharma and Virat Kohli

Similarities attract and it is very evident in the life Sharma and Kohli have built for themselves. Both of them have been each other’s biggest cheerleaders and are committed to following a healthy lifestyle. Individually they are complete too, but together they just glow!

3) Kareena Kapoor Khan and Saif Ali Khan

They say marriage brings two families together. Kareena and Saif have been doing just that. Both of them put a lot of effort into celebrating each other’s families. Both of them share common social and familial interests and never stop going on date nights and vacations together. Talk about keeping the spark alive!

4) Deepika Padukone and Ranveer Singh

Often spotted in complementary outfits, Padukone and Singh are like Yin and Yang. They have opposite energies with her being more calm and collected, and he is more flamboyant. But they evidently establish an equilibrium. Their affection and camaraderie, after so many years of togetherness, is still evident in their social media interaction and public appearances.

5) Priyanka Chopra and Nick Jonas

Be it Jonas grooving to Bollywood tunes or Chopra blending effortlessly in his family, the couple may come from diverse backgrounds but are each other’s biggest supporters.

Conclusion

While relationship goals are necessary, it is important to keep in mind that you don’t chase perfection. Embrace each other’s flaws and work on building a life that helps both of you thrive. Don’t follow anyone else’s couple goals, make your own!

FAQs

Q: My partner and I don’t agree on a few relationship goals. How do I convince them?

A: You can’t “convince” your partner to do something they don’t want to. Set goals for now that you both agree on. You can discuss your individual perspectives on certain goals and approach them with an open mind. Hopefully, both of you will find a middle ground.

Q: How do we ensure we stick to our goals?

A: Set relationship goals that are realistic. Start small and slow. You can start with measurable goals. Say, the number of date nights you can have. Establish a reward system to help you stay motivated.

Also Read: 5 Fun And Romantic Winter Date Ideas