Let’s face it. Most of us love the smell of cash. The soft ping of a message announcing the month’s salary deposited in our account. The thrill of swiping a credit card, knowing that we won’t be overdrawn afterwards. The joy of seeing our bank balances grow and multiply, with time, effort, and sound investments.
Some of these goals may be achievable, but financial planning doesn’t always go the way one envisions it. Unforeseen expenses, pay cuts, job losses, and inflation could often lead to women being waylaid from the financial path they’ve chosen to tread, and their overall vision for the financial future. How, then, does one cope? Financial positivity may just be the buzzword you’re looking for.
“Financial positivity is a state of mind, more than your actual bank balance,” says Bhopal-based life coach and counsellor, Pallavi Sethi. “It means that you are upbeat and positive about your finances, without being careless about them. You work towards being the best you can, but don’t let negative thinking bog you down. There are a few strategic ways to imbibe financial positivity into your life.”
Stop comparing yourself with others
Often, our benchmark for financial success is our peer group. “When your circle of family, friends, or colleagues can afford a certain kind of home, or take a holiday abroad, or buy designer bags and jewellery, it makes you covet the same things,” says Sethi. “This is one of the worst things you can do to yourself. If you decide to keep up with them, you fall into a debt trap. If you do not, you get depressed at the idea of having ‘less’.
“Social media has only compounded this problem – everyone else’s life and financial health seems better, doesn’t it? But don’t forget, you don’t see every bit of their struggle or what goes on behind the scenes. Everyone has their own financial challenges, but chooses to put out only the positive aspects of their journey. So, you shouldn’t get disheartened by the idea that someone else earns more or spends more. When you start focussing on the negative, you start spiralling into a zone where you do not make sensible financial decisions.”
Work towards your own goals in a healthy way
“The best advice my father gave me was that there is no shortcut to getting rich,” says Chartered Accountant Snighda K. Her philosophy has always been ‘little drops of water make a mighty ocean’. It may seem basic, but it is the core value with which she’s grown her savings. “Today, I’m 31 and have my own apartment, significant savings for the future, and can afford to take a long break from work without worrying about my lifestyle – although I probably won’t do that. The key is to stay organised and factor in even the small change that gets spent. Set a budget for yourself, which balances your needs, wants and savings in a sensible manner. A budget doesn’t need to be constricting (you can factor in treats and indulgences too.). Instead, look at it as a guideline. Go over your bills and see if they are in line with the budget you’ve set for yourself. Review your habits –- is there anything that is sucking up more money than it should? Work towards eliminating those habits.
“Set aside time to study investments that can grow your bank balance in a safe way. Meet a banker or a financial planner if you need to. Lastly, dump the ostrich mentality. If there’s a genuine problem with your finances, face it headfirst as soon as you can and sort it out. All of this may seem overwhelming at first, but when you look back at your financial journey, it is extremely fulfilling and satisfying, making you feel positive about life and your future.”
Let go of your past mistakes
One of the key factors that keeps people – particularly women – from feeling good about the money they have, is the money they could have had. According to a survey by Credit Karma, 40 per cent of women have admitted to feeling negative about bad financial decisions, as opposed to only eight per cent who felt ‘excited’. Around 42 per cent of men, on the other hand, felt in control and positive about their financial decisions. Why is this so? Firstly, the gender pay gap. In many industries, women still don’t earn as much as men, so every extra bit of money counts and can’t be squandered. Secondly, women view money lost as a personal failure rather than a blip, since they are often taught to hold themselves to high standards.
Lastly (and this is especially true of women who are caregivers), losing money is tantamount to depriving their parents or children or whoever they are financially responsible for. “Focus on what you can control, not on what you cannot,” says Sethi. “There will always be surprises around the corner and you shouldn’t beat yourself up for a few bad decisions. Also, take care of yourself first and this means being okay with making financial mistakes. If you’re having a hard time coping, consider seeing a counsellor to work through your issues.”
Spend on what gives you happiness
Own your financial situation and find happiness within that. This doesn’t mean you fall into debt – far from it. But your financial life has to bring you satisfaction. Success doesn’t always translate into a bigger bank balance, although it is certainly one of the markers. Be led by your own individual needs and check if your earnings are enough to satisfy them. Says Sethi, “Our spending habits are guided more by what people around us expect us to own, and less by what gives us joy. Does your friend want to go dutch at an expensive restaurant you don’t see value in? You have the right to decline and suggest an alternative that suits you better. Do you want to travel on a modest budget instead of splurging on a 7-star resort that will impress people on Instagram more than it will give you joy? Don’t bother. Financial psychologist Dr Brad Klontz said that your self-worth should not be in your net worth, and I couldn’t agree more.”